Earlier this week I was talking with a friend of mine who also happens to be a Republican and he said something I found both fascinating and frightening.  Just how we got onto the subject I don’t remember, and it is not really important.  What is important is what he said.  “It’s the Democrats fault that we have Trump as President now.  If they hadn’t nominated Obama a second time Trump wouldn’t be President.”

Now just think about what he said for a minute.  What he is saying is that it is Trump got the Republican nomination and was elected President because the Democrats nominated Obama for a 2nd term, and he one.  That Trump’s election is a reaction to electing Obama.  Not Hillary Clinton being nominated, but Obama four years before! What we have here is a great example of ‘Gaslighting’ and blaming the victim.

I will tak on ‘Blaming the Victim’ first.  Just to be totally clear this is what the local bully says, when you were a little kid, says “If you’d just do what I say, I wouldn’t need to bound on you” an you have no idea what he want’s you to do/say.  It is what many a wife beater says and what many of the beaten wives too often think.  And it is so untrue it is unbeleaveable anyone would except it.

Somepeople think/accept this because they have been systematically Gaslighted by someone.  They have drunk The “Koolaid”.  This is just the thing this blog is about fighting.  My friend who send this, say he did not support Trump.  I belieave him.  But then he says something like this and I have to wonder.  Is he just casting about looking for someway to  assuage his conscience for what his political party has inflicted on this country, or what.  Fortunately for both of us, I did not, accept quietly the ‘Koolaid’ being offered.

I asked him several question about just how he got to the point that our having Trump as President was Obama’s fault, or the Democrats fault For nominating him.  After much obviscation we finally got around to the point that it was because Obama was such a bad President.  I was good and did not ask if this meant that the Republicans elected Trump just to show they could do worse.  I did point out that it could just be that, yes Trump is a response to Obama being elected.  Because many people were quite upset that their was “An uppity niger” (Yes I know it is the  offensive ‘N’ word.  It is meant to be offensive).  He, of course took exception as ‘he’ can’t possibly be ‘racist’.  I’m sorry.  I have known many racist in my life, and most of the Americans who were denied it  vehemently. They don’t get that if you act/talk/support racist people/actions/speach you just maybe racist.  I also have learned that direct confrontation is more often than not, the correct way to deal with it.  It is better just to ask a question, my favorite is “Just think about what you sound like right now?”

I have hope for my friend, he has reached the third stage of recovery, denial.  Next is acknowledgement and then change.  Hopefully it will happen before 2020.